Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Please Stop Whistling in Songs

Dear Pop Groups,

Can you please stop whistling in songs? Songs are already hard enough to resist with the catchy lyrics, nearly naked dancers, and riffs that would break the concentration of a Bible scribe. If the Pope has a stereo, I promise you that instead of attending to important issues like blaming AIDS on condoms and shuttling child molesters from one parish to another he's tapping is toes right now to Top 40. And more than likely, it has a whistler in it.

From Foster the People's PUMPED KICKS, to Jason Derulo's IT GIRL and One Republic's GOOD LIFE, it seems like the airwaves have been invaded by whistling. I go to the cafe to work, not have my work interrupted by a tune I can't possibly get out of my head without hypnotherapy.

What's next, a hip hop version of SINGIN IN THE RAIN where a CG Gene Kelly busts a move and breaks out into a rap with a tag credit "feat. Eminmem?" I don't care if you want to see a sky full of lighters, if you feel like a skyscraper, or even a firework, I can't take the catchy tunes anymore.

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